Something Smells

So, we pull into the gas station tonight and I did what any good husband would do. I let the WIFE pump the gas!
She goes inside to get beverages...to leave me vulnerable to the world. Well, it happened. Little did I know that having my window down to let in the first cool breeze in 6 years would bite me in the booty! This fella walks over to my side of the car, leans over, placing a paper IN the car and says "Hey, buddy, how are ya?" "What kind of cologne do you like?"

Time stops and I address the situation from every perspective. First off, I have an (yes 74th time you've read this) AWKWARD meter!! Unless the vehicle is on fire, do NOT reach in towards me or my family!
I respond with "Really?" "You are THIS much in my car?" - he takes offense and says "What, did I freak you out?" -

I said "Well, i have this 'close personal space' issue" - and I've recently had brain surgery (and I lean my head over pointing out the divot in my head!" As to which HE became awkard, backed away and said "Oh, my bad." "Everything okay?" I said "Yeah, I'm alright" - He then fled the scene realizing that the strange pedler at gas stations had better watch out for "North Dallas Man"! as they called me on the TV.

At some point, if I'm not careful, I'm gonna let this tumor go to my head!...:) - but I will use to my advantage.