Breaker 1 - 9.....

Greetings o' sane ones!
I work in a brand new hospital. It's 2009. I have an iPhone. Someone in Korea could read this blog if they choose to do so. Yet, with all of this technology, I find it amusing that one of my main tools of communication recently has been a walkie talkie.
Our phones were just now installed today. So, for the past week or so, the receptionist and I use our handheld-interference-grabbing little terrors to keep the flow of visitors at bay. We don't want anyone wandering around that is not supposed to be there. We also don't want any physicians, or other guests to go very long without being attended to. So, as soon as any blessed soul strolls through our double-automatic-state-of-the-art doors, they are greeted by our receptionist who then.....calls?..pages?..walkies?..me and says "I have so and so from someplace here to see somebody" (except she gets the names right)
So I then...relay?...radio?...talkie?..back and say "okay", then I call the appropriate person and tell them to go to the front. It sounds easy enough. But I found out that it's not a task for the faint-minded.- or anyone without patience....
There I sit in Administration where 3 different physicians are walking through our department getting tours, answering every command of the boss (which I consider a privilege) and filtering other traffic, the little smokey and the bandit symbol goes off! (***"I have czytlr with brzaxter to see phylllt***) - "You have who, from where, to see who?"
I'm sometimes across the room and don't here it and have to run over and ask her to repeat it. Usually a few seconds go by from the first initially misunderstood page and me reaching for it to ask for clarification. So, by the time I pick it up to mash the little button to talk, she pages again - "Hello, is anyone there" - at the same time I'm saying "Who is here?" So it's nothing but silence on both ends save for the last few words spoken by the person who said more. There are others in the hospital that are SUPPOSED to be on different frequencies. But we had "visitors" on the other end a couple of times. For 5 minutes, today, I was in the middle of an OnStar conversation!!
Whenever I have to go off campus to our other offices of lunch I pass it on to whomever is available (and that I trust can handle it.) By the time I get back, whether 30 minutes or an hour and a half, they are at the receptionist's table with the operator breathing heavy, slouching and outstretching their hand hardly waiting to give it back to me as I perambulate through the doors! Now that the phones are ready I can give it the proper burial!!

Birthday parties are fun aren't they? 8 year olds everywhere. Cake. Bowling. Beer. - Uh, beer? Yeah, that's right. The Dave-O was offered a beer at his son's friend's birthday party last week. That normal? Did I take it? That'll be a negative ghost rider! I think there is a redneck joke in there somewhere though!

Monday's are usually devoted to quartet practice night. The last one we had our baritone had informed us, well before we began, that he may not be able to sing due to sickness and sore throat. But, like a trooper, he showed up anyway. But, before he got to the church, he called and said that he's going to be a little late due to traffic. Duane (bass singer) took the call and told him not to talk. He said "snap once for yes" "Twice for no" - I quickly chimed in "Three times for 'I can't snap'"

My wife's aunt is a dispatcher and radios to the authorities/medical personnel whenever emergencies arrive. Recently, while at home, she had to call the ambulance. - Would have been convenient had she been on shift at the time. - Breaker 1 - 9 we have a 1041 in the Johnson home, then come on back and get me 'cause I don't feel well?" - Which would probably interfere with my walkie talkies and get me on the other end saying "You have who, from where, to see who....?".......

Later! Dave